Jay's Favorite Expressions and Quotes

E-mail: jay(at)salsburg(dot)com

Mediocrity knows nothing beyond itself! Jay Salsburg

When all else fails, men turn to reason. Abba Eban

Reality; God's Cosmic Gag Reel.

A seminar on Time Travel will be held last week.

A great truth is a truth whose opposite is also a great truth. Unknown

The Mind is not a vessel to be filled but a fire to be lighted. Plutarch

For it is a truth, which the experience of all ages has attested, that the people are commonly most in danger when the means of injuring their rights are the possession of those of whom they entertain the least suspicion. Alexander Hamilton

To understand the Universe, you must understand the language in which it's written, the language of Mathematics. Galileo

The difficult thing about doing the right thing, it is knowing what the right thing is. Jay Salsburg

Yes, I can hold two or more ambivalent, contradictory, extra-temporal, and non-linear thoughts in my head at the same time and this makes me unhappy to do this for you but I can't help it, because it comes naturally to me, being a human being, I am imbued with “Principals of Self Determination” otherwise known as free will. Jay Salsburg

begin Carl Sagan quotes

“Power plus ignorance equals destruction.
“Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known.”
“If you want to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe.”
“You have to know the past to understand the present.”
“We are star-stuff”
“Absence of evidence is not evidence of absence.”
“... the use of our intelligence quite properly gives us pleasure. In this respect the brain is like a muscle. When we think well, we feel good. Understanding is a kind of ecstasy.”
“Knowing a great deal is not the same as being smart; intelligence is not information alone but also judgment, the manner in which information is collected and used”
“We are like butterflies who flutter for a day and think its forever.”
“We are the product of 4.5 billion years of fortuitous, slow biological evolution. There is no reason to think that the evolutionary process has stopped. Man is a transitional animal. He is not the climax of creation.”
“Imagination will often carry us to worlds that never were. But without it we go nowhere.”
“A celibate clergy is an especially good idea, because it tends to suppress any hereditary propensity toward fanaticism.”
“The universe seems neither benign nor hostile, merely indifferent.”
“I believe that the extraordinary should be pursued. But extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence.”
“It's better to light a candle than to curse the darkness.”
“Skeptical scrutiny is the means, in both science and religion, by which deep insights can be winnowed from deep nonsense”
“You can't convince a believer of anything; for their belief is not based on evidence, it's based on a deep seated need to believe”
“A religion old or new, that stressed the magnificence of the universe as revealed by modern science, might be able to draw forth reserves of reverence and awe hardly tapped by the conventional faiths. Sooner or later, such a religion will emerge.”
“When Kepler found his long-cherished belief did not agree with the most precise observation, he accepted the uncomfortable fact. He preferred the hard truth to his dearest illusions; that is the heart of science.”
“Who are we? We find that we live on an insignificant planet of a humdrum star lost in a galaxy tucked away in some forgotten corner of a universe in which there are far more galaxies than people.”
“We live in a society exquisitely dependent on science and technology, in which hardly anyone knows anything about science and technology.”
“There are many hypotheses in science which are wrong. That's perfectly all right; they're the aperture to finding out what's right. Science is a self-correcting process. To be accepted, new ideas must survive the most rigorous standards of evidence and scrutiny.”
“It is of interest to note that while some dolphins are reported to have learned English - up to fifty words used in correct context - no human being has been reported to have learned dolphinese.”
“Science is a way of thinking much more than it is a body of knowledge.”
“The brain is like a muscle. When it is in use we feel very good. Understanding is joyous.”
“We are a way for the cosmos to know itself”
“The well-meaning contention that all ideas have equal merit seems to me little different from the disastrous contention that no ideas have any merit.”
“It is far better to grasp the Universe as it really is than to persist in delusion, however satisfying and reassuring.”
“Our species needs, and deserves, a citizenry with minds wide awake and a basic understanding of how the world works.”
“For small creatures such as we the vastness is bearable only through love.”
“When you make the finding yourself - even if you're the last person on Earth to see the light - you never forget it.”
“Skeptical scrutiny is the means, in both science and religion, by which deep thoughts can be winnowed from deep nonsense.”
“Personally, I would be delighted if there were a life after death, especially if it permitted me to continue to learn about this world and others, if it gave me a chance to discover how history turns out.”
“A galaxy is composed of gas and dust and stars - -billions upon billions of stars”
“The universe is not required to be in perfect harmony with human ambition.”
“Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence”
“If we long to believe that the stars rise and set for us, that we are the reason there is a Universe, does science do us a disservice in deflating our conceits?”
“The wind whips through the canyons of the American Southwest, and there is no one to hear it but us - a reminder of the 40,000 generations of thinking men and women who preceded us, about whom we know almost nothing, upon whom our civilization is based.”
“I maintain there is much more wonder in science than in pseudoscience. And in addition, to whatever measure this term has any meaning, science has the additional virtue, and it is not an inconsiderable one, of being true.”
“The surface of the Earth is the shore of the cosmic ocean. From it we have learned most of what we know. Recently, we have waded a little out to sea, enough to dampen our toes or, at most, wet our ankles. The water seems inviting. The ocean calls. So”
“In science it often happens that scientists say, 'You know that's a really good argument; my position is mistaken', and then they would actually change their minds and you never hear that old view from them again. They really do it. It doesn't happen”

end Carl Sagan quotes

I didn't do anything wrong and I promise to never do it again. Richard Nixon

"Behind every great fortune there is a great crime," has appeared as a quotation of Balzac; but it may have originated in a paraphrase in The Oil Barons: Men of Greed and Grandeur (1971) by Richard O'Connor, p. 47: "Balzac maintained that behind every great fortune there is a great crime."

There is a chasm of difference between confidence and certainty.

Advice is seldom welcome; and those who want it the most always like it the least. Philip Dormer Stanhope, 4th Earl of Chesterfield

Gossip: The art of saying nothing while leaving nothing unsaid.

Oliver's Law: A closed mouth gathers no feet.

What is not there will not break, what is not there cannot be explained.

Once you get the questions right, then you can pursue the answers.

You cannot get a new economy without a new society. Alvin Toffler

The future arrives too soon and in the wrong order. Alvin Toffler

Little people discuss other people, average people discuss events, big people discuss ideas.

History is an excellent thing, if only it were true. Gore Vidal

When you sacrifice principals for passion, even if you win, you loose.

Extremism in the support of Liberty is no vice.

The general principle of an institution is to service the people in the institution, not service the people to which it exists to serve. Jay Salsburg

Working as a Functionary for a Company (Corporation) and claiming to be a Scientist is like being a Monk in a Monastery and claiming to be God. Jay Salsburg

My World can be seen as a unit in two parts - In the World of Human Affairs where there are no Rules and Nature, where the Rules are Immutable and Eternal. Jay Salsburg

Going to a Job (or having a Degree) does not make you a Scientist any more than going to Sears makes you a Mechanic. Jay Salsburg

Perception is Reality (Salesman). Reality is not Perception (Scientist). Jay Salsburg

If God had meant for there to be Justice, he would have given us Minds. Jay Salsburg

Institutions based on Authority promise honesty, Institutions based on Know-how promise understanding. Jay Salsburg

When the train (plane) slows for the station the Steward announces, "Please prepare to detrain (deplane)." If I am in my car about to pull into my driveway, should I prepare to decar? Jay Salsburg

We use Science to bring origins in contact with destiny.

Teaching Science = bologna detection kit.

Crystals reveal their hidden structures only when broken. Sigmund Freud

The things to do are: the things that need doing, that you see need to be done, and that no one else seems to see need to be done. R. Buckminster Fuller

Perception is one millionth of one percent reality (truth in fact). R. Buckminster Fuller

Truth is the progressive diminution of residual error. R. Buckminster Fuller

That which is communicated, i.e., understood, is metaphysical. The means of communication is physical. R. Buckminster Fuller

I seem to be a verb, an evolutionary process - an integral function of the universe. R. Buckminster Fuller

Dare to be naive. R. Buckminster Fuller

...doing more with less. R. Buckminster Fuller

Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there. Will Rogers

We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress. Will Rogers

Charlie Chaplin had a Charlie Chaplin-look-alike contest in Monte Carlo, he came in third.

Why do Camacozi Pilots where helmets? Jay Salsburg

Why do executioners sterilize the needles and swab the arm of the condemned with alcohol for lethal injection? Jay Salsburg

How does the Snow Plow operator get to work in a blizzard? I want the car he drives. Jay Salsburg

The Police Officer told me the neighbors think I am a racist. I told him to tell them I am an equal opportunity Bigot, I hate everyone equally. Jay Salsburg

Power is never shared, only taken.

The following statement is true

The previous statement is false

The following statement is false

The previous statement is true

Nil Carborundum Illigitium, or Illigitium Na Carborundum (Latin, Don't let the Bastards grind you down). Source unknown

The price of Freedom is eternal Vigilance.

Semeiology (no it is not spelled incorrectly) - Pragmatics, Semantics, Syntactics

The reasonable man adapts himself to the world: the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man. George Bernard Shaw

The people that get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and if they can't find them, make them. George Bernard Shaw

The plain working truth is that it is not only good for people to be shocked occasionally, but absolutely necessary to the progress of society that they should be shocked pretty often. George Bernard Shaw

Anarchism is a game at which the Police can beat you. George Bernard Shaw

He believes in the fine arts with all the earnestness of a man who does not understand them. George Bernard Shaw

The liar's punishment is not in the least that he is not believed, but that he cannot believe anyone else. George Bernard Shaw

In the movie "Citizen Cohn," McCarthy and Cohn asked "are you going to give up your (Communist) cell" the character of Dashiell Hammett replied, "I know what you're thinking about, but it isn't so, no how, contrariwise, if it was so, it might be, and if it were so, it would be, but as it isn't, it ain' t. That's logic.

Life is a waste of time, time is a waste of life, get wasted all the time, and you'll have the time of your life. Irish limerick

Pay attention lads, I'm only going to show this once. Lecture from Suicide Bomb Instructor

Half of Louisiana is under water and the other half is under indictment. Congressman Billy Tauzin

It doesn't matter if the Cat is Black or White as long as it catches mice. Dong Chow Ping

Three can keep a secret if two are dead. Carlos Marcello

It is an anomaly that we can split the atom, but we are nearly powerless to persuade each other to embrace justice. Gerry Spence

We could advance the human race enormously if we but learned to communicate honestly with our neighbors. Gerry Spence

Without argument the species would parish. Gerry Spence

The art of arguing is the art of living. We argue because we must, because life emends it, because, in the end, life itself is but an argument. Gerry Spence

Successful argument is a communication between the acknowledged authority of both parties to the argument. Gerry Spence

The sign should read, PLEASE ARGUE WITH ME! Gerry Spence

We are afraid. But fear confirms life and identifies the source of every successful argument - ourselves. Gerry Spence

In America you get as much justice as you can afford. OJ Simpson

Men hear what they want to hear and disregard the rest.

There's plenty of room for all God's creatures, right next to the Mashed Potatoes.

The World may only be transformed by a change in consciousness.

Things that are Complex are not useful - Things that are useful are Simple. Mikhail Kalashnikov http://kalashnikov.guns.ru/

Drinking Wine in sufficient quantity, produces all the effects of drunkenness. (Annotated from a play by Oskar Wilde)

The youth of America is their oldest tradition. It has been going on now for three hundred years. Oskar Wilde

I couldn't help it. I can resist everything except temptation. Oskar Wilde

In this world there are but two tragedies, one is not to get what one wants, the other is getting it. Oskar Wilde

Bigamy is having one wife/husband too many. Monogamy is the same. Oscar Wilde

I could have been a Rhodes Scholar, except for my grades. Duffy Daugherty / Michigan State 

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. Frank Sinatra

If drinking and driving is illegal, why do Bars have Parking lots?

Don't drink and drive, you might spill some.

Say no to Drugs, that way you will have more time to drink.

You know, in Washington I work with Boobs everyday. US Senator, John Mc Cain - US Navy, POW in North Viet Nam

U.S. Army...We are proud of our Privates.

I vote for Anarchy.

On a long enough time line, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.

Be more or less specific.

When I was a boy I was told anyone could become President. I can believe that now more than then.

The World Jewish Society today railed at President Bush for sending them Rosh HaShanah greetings a week early. He appologized and said he would send them all a Christmas gift.

outré - French for outrageous

"Wise men benefit more from fools than fools from wise men; for the wise avoid the fools' mistakes, but fools do not follow the wise's successes." Marcus Porcius Cato
(234 B.C. - 149 B,C.), Roman statesman.

Public Schools are the nurseries of all vice and immorality. Henry Fielding

Nothing good uses bad.

What happens to Black Folks today, happens to White Folks tomorrow. Dick Gregory

Nothing is too wonderful to be true. Faraday

We all descended from a long line of noble predators.

Life is absurd, Nature laughs at us behind our backs. Jay Salsburg

Its all about ass, you kick it or you lick it.

You can't solve a problem with the same mind that created it. Albert Einstein

The most incomprehensible thing about the world is that it is comprehensible. Albert Einstein

I never think of the Future, it never comes quickly enough. Albert Einstein

Before God we are equally wise - and equally foolish. Albert Einstein

Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds. Albert Einstein

Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen. Albert Einstein

1930 Radio Exposition speech by Albert Einstein in Germany
The real source of all technical progress is `Divine Inquisitiveness,' and the instinct for play, the constructing and pondering researcher, and no less, the constructive imagination of the technical inventor. Technicians not only ease the daily work of humans, but also make available the works of the finest thinkers and artists for the general public who's enjoyment, only a short time ago was a privilege of the great, and thus has awakened the people from a sleepy stupor.

In their struggle for the ethical good, teachers of religion must have the stature to give up the doctrine of a personal god. Albert Einstein

I cannot imagine a God who rewards and punishes the objects of his creation, whose purposes are modeled after our own -- a God, in short, who is but a reflection of human frailty. Neither can I believe that the individual survives the death of his body, although feeble souls harbor such thoughts through fear or ridiculous egotisms. Albert Einstein

Heisenberg was driving down the Autobahn whereupon he was pulled over by a policeman. The policeman asked, “Do you know how fast you were going back there?” Heisenberg replied, “No, but I know where I am.”

The Doppler effect is the tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when you come at them rapidly.

11th Commandment: Thou shalt not commit Omission. (perhaps Oxymoronic)

It's DejaVu all over again. Micky Mantle

Teleology

Good artists copy. Great artists steal. (Pablo Picasso 1953, Steve Jobs 1979, Bill Gates 1984)

When the Senate Investigative Committee confronted the creator of Microsoft with the issue that "it looks like you are trying to create a monopoly," he replied, "No I am not trying to create a monopoly, I am trying to control the f'ing world." Robin Williams

Diapers are much like Politicians, they should be changed often for the same reason. Robin Williams

A good scare is worth more to a man than good advice. Edgar Watson Howe

The authorities were at their wit's end, nor had it taken them long to get there. Desmond MacCarthy

You're making not making the Doctor unhappy happy. The Firesign Theater

You see, everything you know is wrong. The Firesign Theater

This is real, reel number 111. The Firesign Theater

Hymn to Presumptuous Assumption (sung by Pastor Flashes)...
Oh blinding light,
Oh light that blinds,
I can not see,
Look out for me. Firesign Theatre

We can only identify things if we can give that thing a name. A face is not a knee, a knee is not a face.

I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception. Groucho Marx

The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made. Groucho Marx

I don't want to belong to any club that will have me as a member. Groucho Marx

He that lies with dogs, riseth with fleas. George Herbert

Just because I own an Elephant Gun and there are no Elephants in my neighborhood does not mean that owning the Elephant gun makes me a successful Elephant hunter.

Nothing endures but change. Heraclitus

No good deed goes unpunished.

America is the only nation in history which miraculously has gone from barbarism to degeneration without the usual interval of civilization. George Clemenceau

Don't wait for the last judgment, it happens everyday. Albert Camus

THE ONLY WAY TO MAKE MONEY IN A CASINO IS TO OWN ONE. STEVE WYNN, CEO MIRAGE RESORTS

de jure (Latin) existing by lawful right

de facto (Latin) existing by fact

semper fidelis (Latin) always faithful

My God, I haven't had sex like that since I was in grade school.

Watching Sex on TV with Mom and Dad is embarrassing. I didn't even know they knew how to use the Camcorder.

Andy Rooney says he will keep reading the Wall Street Journal (WSJ) even though he dosn't understand it, because even if the world comes to an end, the WSJ will have a story about it.

Every Naval vessel has a contingent of Marines aboard. After all, the Sailors have to have someone to dance with. Bob Hope

Miniskirts have become quite a fad. They're even some guys wearing them. Don't laugh, if you had thought to of that, you'd not be here now. Bob Hope entertaining troops in Viet Nam

Don't talk to me about naval tradition. It's nothing but rum, sodomy and the lash. Winston Churchill

Don't worry about avoiding temptation as you grow older, it will avoid you. Winston Churchill

You can always count on the Americans to do the right thing, after they exhaust all other options. Winston Churchill

It is a good thing for an uneducated man to read a book of quotations. Winston Churchill

A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject. Winston Churchill

I learned one thing; you never do anything for fame or money. You only do things 'cause they're fun or good. If you can combine the two at the same time, you can make a contribution to the world and have a lot of happiness. Abbie Hoffman

A liberal is one who fears concentrated power. The Economist

This is my rifle, there are many like it, but this one is mine. Without my rifle, I am nothing, without me, my rifle is nothing. Marine Corps Chant

What is the Marine Corps Birthday? November 10th, 1775. Birthplace? Tun Tavern, Philadelphia.

The only easy day is yesterday. US Navy Seals

To be a Team, every member must trust each of the other team member's commitment to the group, where, above all else, is the loyalty to ones peers. US Navy Seals

Got nothing to do, don't do it here. Military saying

If you want to know how stupid people really are, just think how stupid the average person is and realize that half of them are stupider. George Carlin

We think in language. The quality of our thoughts and ideas can only be as good as the quality of our language. George Carlin

In the Navy, there is no wrong hole. In the Marines, there is always a hole. George Carlin

All War is, is a bunch of prick waving. George Carlin

By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth. George Carlin

As far as I'm concerned, humans have not yet come up with a belief that's worth believing. George Carlin

Most people of low self esteem have earned it. George Carlin

We stopped the Germans from conquering the World because that's our job, George Carlin

The US Army has announced that although it is true they performed mind-destroying drug tests on hundreds of soldiers in the 1960s, none of the victims have been promoted beyond the rank of lieutenant colonel. George Carlin

The American Businessman's Ten Steps to Product Development ---

1. Can I cut corners in the design?
2. Can it be shoddily built?
3. Can I use cheap materials?
4. Will it create hazards for my workers?
5. Will it harm the environment?
6. Can I evade the safety laws?
7. Will children die from it?
8. Can I overprice it?
9. Can it be falsely advertised?
10. Will it force smaller competitors out of business?
Excellent. Let's get busy. George Carlin

Every time you're exposed to advertising in America you're reminded that this country's most profitable business is still the manufacture, packaging, distribution, and marketing of bullshit. High-quality, grade-A, prime-cut, pure American bullshit. George Carlin

So far, this is the oldest I've been. George Carlin

A crazy person doesn't really lose his mind. It just becomes something more entertaining. George Carlin

I think everyone should treat one another in a Christian manner. I will not however be responsible for the consequences. George Carlin

Sudden total weight loss. George Carlin

How can it be a spy satellite if they announce on television that it's a spy satellite? George Carlin

Engineers at General Motors have developed a revolutionary new engine whose only function is to lubricate itself. George Carlin

I think TV remotes should have a button that allows you to kill the person on the screen. George Carlin

In the United States, anybody can be President. That's the problem. George Carlin

Electricity is really just organized lightning. George Carlin

Just when I discovered the meaning of life, it changed. George Carlin

The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity. George Carlin

Sex criminals. Completely incurable... I suppose you could outlaw religion and these sex crimes would disappear in a generation or two, but we don't have time for rational solutions. George Carlin

I make fun of people who are religious, because they're fundamentally weak. George Carlin

When you look at the average American you realize there's nothing nature enjoys more than a good joke. George Carlin

Hitler never bothered with restaurant reservations; he just dropped by. And somehow they always found him a table. George Carlin

Professional soldiers are people who die for a living. George Carlin

I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it. Unknown

Earth is the insane asylum for the universe. Unknown

God must love stupid people; He made so many. Unknown

The gene pool could use a little chlorine. Unknown

Consciousness: That annoying time between naps. Unknown

Ever stop to think, and forget to start again? Unknown

Ham and eggs...A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig. Unknown

Smith and Wesson; The original point and click interface. Unknown

Philosophy is a game with objectives and no rules. Mathematics is a game with rules and no objectives. Unknown

semper eadem (Latin) always the same

semper idem (Latin) always the same thing

Don't blow Saturday night with an ordinary nut. Planter's Nut Commercial

Charlatanism of some degree is indispensable to effective leadership. Eric Hoffer, US philosopher

To lead the people, walk behind them. Lao-Tzu, Chinese philosopher

MISSILE ENVY, Dr Helen Caldicott

Men are generally more careful of the breed of their horses and dogs than of their children. William Penn

What is the difference between a wife and Charlie Manson - Manson has the decency to look crazy when you first meet him.

She was so sweet, I could eat her brains like jam. From the movie Legend

Q: "What is fast transportation?"
A: "When a farmer ships two rabbits 100 miles by truck and it arrives with two rabbits."

What does a redneck say just before he dies? "Hey ya'll, watch this!"

When I die, I want to die like my grandfather--who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.

What gets us into trouble is not what we don’t know, it’s what we know for sure that just ain’t so. Mark Twain.

I learned that a good lie can travel twice around the Globe before the truth can get its boots on. Mark Twain

When in doubt tell the truth, Mark Twain

Truth is the most valuable thing we have. Let's economize it. Mark Twain

Last week, I stated this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister, and now wish to withdraw that statement. Mark Twain

Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress.. But I repeat myself. Mark Twain

Why in Hell should I have to Press 1 for English?

It is difficult to get a man to understand something when his salary depends upon his not understanding it. Upton Sinclair

What, me worry? Alfred E. Newman

Nothing bad ever happens, why should I care? Danny Elfman

The secret of the demagogue is to make himself as stupid as his audience so that they believe they are as clever as he. Karl Kraus

Evil will prosper as long as good people do nothing.

Q: What is the difference between a Cult and a Religion?
A: 100 years.

Evil is good, Eddie Murphy

You can't get wet from the word water. Alan Watts

What is beyond Theology? Alan Watts

Our normal sense of the person as a lonely island of consciousness, is a dramatic illusion based on theological imagery. Alan Watts

The world's population will multiply more rapidly than the available food supply. Malthus, 1812

Only the fittest will survive. Darwin

I am the best you can get, have you guessed me yet, I'm the slime oozin' out of your TV set. Frank Zappa

Without deviation, progress is not possible. Frank Zappa

YOU HAVE TO BE TRUSTED BY THE PEOPLE THAT YOU LIE TO, SO THAT YOU WILL GET THE CHANCE TO PUT THE KNIFE IN. Pink Floyd

The large print giveth and the small print taketh away.

Only the dead have seen the end of war. Plato

...all men are created equal. (Thomas Jefferson) ...some more equal than others. George Orwell

The organizing principal for any culture is War. George Orwell

He who controls the past, controls the future. George Orwell

War is Peace, Freedom is Slavery, Ignorance is Strength. George Orwell

A patriot must always be ready to defend his country against his government. Edward Abbey

Your Sentence; You shall be hung from the neck, until you cheer-up.

If a cow laughs, does milk come out her nose.

They say that Country Music speaks to the heart, the trouble is that it has to go through the ears to get there.

I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy. Steve Martin

All I now about Sex I can only do with one hand. Beaux Guss

You know that look women get when they want sex?
......me neither. Drew Carey

Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as meaningless experiences go, it's pretty damned good. Woody Allen

Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night. Woody Allen

Remember, if you smoke after sex you're doing it too fast. Woody Allen

Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand. Unknown

How can you make your wife mad while making love? Call her from your cell phone.

If it weren't for pickpockets I'd have no sex life at all. Rodney Dangerfield

My cousin is an agoraphobic homosexual, which makes it kind of difficult for him to come out of the closet. Bill Kelly

As the French say, there are three sexes- men, women, and clergymen. Rev. Sydney Smith

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending and to have the two as close together as possible. George Burns

I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty. George Burns

Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope. George Burns

It isn't premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married. Matt Barry

Life is a sexually transmitted disease. Unknown

My kid had sex with your honor student. Bumper Sticker

My sexual preference is not you. Tshirt

Programming is like sex. One mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life. Michael Sinz

Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation. The other eight are unimportant. Henry Miller

The Bible contains 6 admonishments to homosexuals and 362 admonishments to heterosexuals. That doesn't mean that God doesn't love heterosexuals. It's just that they need more supervision. Lynn Lavner

There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. P. J. ORourke

The best way to protect yourself from change is to not bother with questions - nevermind the answers because the questions are ignored. Source unknown

Only the fool says in his heart: There is no god -- The wise says it to the world. Anonymous

Men create gods after their own image, not only with regard to their form but with regard to their mode of life. Aristotle

Properly read, the Bible is the most potent force for atheism ever conceived. Isaac Asimov

Religion is excellent stuff for keeping common people quiet. Napoleon Bonaparte

Sufferer's prayer - God, could you take away my misery?

God's answer - No, Of course not, if I took away your misery you wouldn't talk to me anymore. Bill Maher

What's God? <Subject Lincoln Asking question> Well, you know when you want something really bad and you close your eyes and you wish for it? God's the guy that ignores you. <Subject Technician answering> Oh. Right. <Subject Lincoln responding> From The Island Motion Picture.

"God is dead: Nietzsche. Nietzsche is dead: God." Unknown

The point of philosophy is to start with something so simple as to seem not worth stating, and to end with something so paradoxical that no one will believe it. Unknown

If you are picking the lesser of two evils, you are still picking Evil. Gerry Garcia

I have seldom met an intelligent person whose views were not narrowed and distorted by religion. James Buchanan

The more I study religions, the more I am convinced that man never worshipped anything but himself. Richard Burton

The priests used to say that faith can move mountains, and nobody believed them. Today the scientists say that they can level mountains, and nobody doubts them. Joseph Campbell

Gods are fragile things; they may be killed by a whiff of science or a dose of common sense. Chapman Cohen

Faith is the great cop-out, the great excuse to evade the need to think and evaluate evidence. Faith is belief in spite of, even perhaps because of, the lack of evidence. Richard Dawkins

I have never seen the slightest scientific proof of the religious theories of heaven and hell, of future life for individuals, or of a personal God. Thomas Edison

It is the best book ever written on the subject. There is nothing like it!" - Thomas Edison on Thomas Paine's Age of Reason

God, immortality, duty -- how inconceivable the first, how unbelievable the second, how peremptory and absolute the third. George Eliot [Mary Ann Evans]

As men's prayers are a disease of the will, so are their creeds a disease of the intellect. Ralph Waldo Emerson

The way to see by faith is to shut the eye of reason. Benjamin Franklin

Lighthouses are more helpful than churches. Benjamin Franklin

The notion that faith in Christ is to be rewarded by an eternity of bliss, while a dependence upon reason, observation, and experience merits everlasting pain, is too absurd for refutation, and can be relieved only by that unhappy mixture of insanity and ignorance called 'faith.' Robert Ingersoll

When it comes to bullshit, truly major league bullshit, you have to stand back in awe, of the all-time heavy weight champion of false promises and exaggerated claims; Religion, Organized Religion. George Carlin

Religion is the sigh of the oppressed creature, the heart of a heartless world, and the soul of soulless conditions. It is the opium of the people. Karl Marx

Praying is better than masturbation, it makes you feel good, but without the mess. Jay Salsburg

The invisible and the non-existent look very much alike. Delos B. McKown

Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. Margaret Mead

We must question the story logic of having an all-knowing all-powerful God, who creates faulty Humans, and then blames them for his own mistakes. Gene Roddenberry

The biggest cause of trouble in the world today is that the stupid people are so sure about things and the intelligent folks are so full of doubts. Bertrand Russell

Fear is the main source of superstition, and one of the main sources of cruelty. To conquer fear is the beginning of wisdom. Bertrand Russell

It is sad that while science moves ahead in exciting new areas of research, fine-tuning our knowledge of how life originated and evolved, creationists remain mired in medieval debates about angels on the head of a pin and animals in the belly of an Ark. Michael Shermer

It ain' t the parts of the Bible that I can't understand that bother me, it is the parts that I do understand. Mark Twain

The only book as highly circulated as the Christian Bible is Euclid's "Elements," I will leave it up to you to decide which is most significant.

Shreveport Policeman: Your black neighbors hate you. They say you are prejudiced. Me: I do not hate blacks, I hate everyone. I am an equal opportunity bigot.

God is consistently referred to in Western Culture as he, his, or him. If this means God is male, does he have a penis? If so is it really big?

The official's heart must stand at attention before his mind. A. A. Bestuzhev-Marlinsky

The highest measure of democracy is neither the 'extent of freedom' nor the 'extent of equality', but rather the highest measure of participation. A. d. Benoist

Democracy is not something you believe in or a place to hang your hat, but it's something you do. You participate. If you stop doing it, democracy crumbles. Abbie Hoffman

Elections belong to the people. It is their decision. If they decide to turn their back on the fire and burn their behinds, then they will just have to sit on their blisters. Abraham Lincoln

As I would not be a slave, so I would not be a master. This expresses my idea of democracy. Abraham Lincoln (1809-1865)

The ballot is stronger than the bullet. Abraham Lincoln (1809-1865)

Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power. Abraham Lincoln (1809-1865)

Democracy is the government of the people, by the people, for the people. Abraham Lincoln (1809-1865)

As a rule, dictatorships guarantee safe streets and terror of the doorbell. In democracy the streets may be unsafe after dark, but the most likely visitor in the early hours will be the milkman. Adam Michnik

A free society is one where it is safe to be unpopular. Adlai Ewing Stevenson

Until lions have their historians, tales of the hunt shall always glorify the hunter. African proverb

Democracy consists of choosing your dictators, after they've told you what you think it is you want to hear. Alan Coren

Freedom is when the people can speak, democracy is when the government listens. Alastair Farrugia

Dictatorships are one-way streets. Democracy boasts two-way traffic. Albert Moravia

Great is truth, but still greater, from a practical point of view, is silence about truth. Aldous Huxley

The people is always expressive of the truth. The life of a people cannot be a lie. Alexander Herzen

A democracy cannot exist as a permanent form of government. It can only exist until a majority of voters discover that they can vote themselves largess out of the public treasury. Alexander Tytler

Democracy does not create strong ties between people. But it does make living together easier. Alexis de Tocqueville

The art of progress is to preserve order amid change, and to preserve change amid order. Alfred North Whitehead

The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don't have any. Alice Walker

Conversation would be vastly improved by the constant use of four simple words: I do not know. Andre Maurois

Intellectual freedom is the only guarantee of a scientific - democratic approach to politics, economic development, and culture. Andrei Dmitrievich Sakharov

We must all live so that our children do not have to pay for our deeds. Andrejs Upits

Tyranny and despotism can be exercised by many, more rigorously, more vigorously, and more severely, than by one. Andrew Johnson

If liberty and equality, as is thought by some, are chiefly to be found in democracy, they will be best attained when all persons alike share in the government to the utmost. Aristotle

Democracy is when the indigent, and not the men of property, are the rulers. Aristotle

If liberty and equality are chiefly to be found in democracy, they will be best attained when all persons alike share in the government to the utmost. Aristotle

It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it. Aristotle

The great thing about democracy is that it gives every voter a chance to do something stupid. Art Spander

The wild, cruel beast is not behind the bars of the cage. He is in front of it. Axel Munthe

Individual rights are not subject to a public vote; a majority has no right to vote away the rights of a minority; the political function of rights is precisely to protect minorities from oppression by majorities (and the smallest minority on earth is the individual). Ayn Rand

That's free enterprise, friends: freedom to gamble, freedom to lose. And the great thing -- the truly democratic thing about it -- is that you don't even have to be a player to lose. Barbara Ehrenreich

Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch. Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote! Benjamin Franklin

They that can give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty or safety. Benjamin Franklin

They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety. Benjamin Franklin

Vote for the man who promises least; he'll be the least disappointing. Bernard Baruch

Those against politics are in favor of the politics inflicted upon them. Bertolt Brecht

A democrat need not believe that the majority will always reach a wise decision. He should however believe in the necessity of accepting the decision of the majority, be it wise or unwise, until such a time that the majority reaches another decision. Bertrand Russell

A citizen of America will cross the ocean to fight for democracy, but won't cross the street to vote in a national election. Bill Vaughan

We are usually convinced more easily by reasons we have found ourselves than by those which have occurred to others. Blaise Pascal

Democrats will play the old Washington game of calling reductions in the rate of growth of spending for any program a 'cut'. Bruce Bartlett

Those wanting to improve democracy in their countries should not wait for permission. Bulent Ecevit

Democracy means decision by those concerned. Carl-Friedrich von Weizsaecker

In order to become the master, the politician poses as the servant. Charles de Gaulle

Since a politician never believes what he says, he is surprised when others believe him. Charles DeGaulle

In democracy everyone has the right to be represented, even the jerks. Chris Patten

He who strikes terror into others is himself in continual fear. Claudian

Democracy means government by discussion, but it is only effective if you can stop people talking. Clement Atlee

Tyrants have not yet discovered any chains that can fetter the mind. Colton

Democracy: In which you say what you like and do what you're told. Dave Barry

A fool is very dangerous when in power. Denis Fonvizin

It is far more honest to be undeservedly ignored than to be honored without merit. Denis Fonvizin

The more developed a nation is, the more complete is the independence of the individual, and the safer the individual from encroachments by another. Dmitry Pisarev

So easily do weak men put in high positions turn villains. Dmitry Pisarev

Politics ought to be the part-time profession of every citizen who would protect the rights and privileges of free people and who would preserve what is good and fruitful in our national heritage. Dwight D. Eisenhower

Democracy is the recurrent suspicion that more than half of the people are right more than half the time. E. B. White

Tyrants are always assassinated too late. That is their great excuse. E.M. Cioran

Spoon feeding in the long run teaches us nothing but the shape of the spoon. E.M. Forster

Freedom without obligation is anarchy. Freedom with obligation is democracy. Earl Riney

Laws, like houses, lean on one another. Edmund Burke

The people never give up their liberties but under some delusion. Edmund Burke

General rebellions and revolts of a whole people never were encouraged now or at any time. They are always provoked. Edmuns Burke

The best weapon of a dictatorship is secrecy; the best weapon of a democracy is openness. Edvard Teller

There may be times when we are powerless to prevent injustice, but there must never be a time when we fail to protest. Elie Wiesel

Only the educated are free. Epictetus

He who allows oppression, shares the crime. Erasmus Darwin, grandfather of Charles Darwin

Fifty-one percent of a nation can establish a totalitarian regime, suppress minorities and still remain democratic. Erik von Kuehnelt-Leddihn

As long as the differences and diversities of mankind exist, democracy must allow for compromise, for accommodation, and for the recognition of differences. Eugene McCarthy

When great changes occur in history, when great principles are involved, as a rule the majority are wrong. The minority are right. Eugene V. Debs

Democracy is based on the assumption that a million men are wiser than one man. How's that again? I missed something. Excerpt from the notebooks of Lazarus Long, from Robert Heinlein's "Time Enough for Love"

Perhaps the fact that we have seen millions voting themselves into complete dependence on a tyrant has made our generation understand that to choose one's government is not necessarily to secure freedom. F.A. Hayek

If men were angels, no government would be necessary. If angels were to govern men, neither external nor internal controls on government would be necessary. Federalist Papers

It's dangerous to be right when the government is wrong. Francois Marie Arouet Voltaire

Find out just what any people will quietly submit to and you have found out the exact measure of injustice and wrong which will be imposed upon them. Frederick Douglass

The limits of tyrants are prescribed by the endurance of those whom they oppress. Frederick Douglass

Those who profess to favor freedom, and yet depreciate agitation, are men who want rain without thunder and lightning. Frederick Douglass

Arbitrary rule has its basis, not in the strength of the state or the chief, but in the moral weakness of the individual, who submits almost without resistance to the domineering power. Friedrich Hatzel

Democratic institutions form a system of quarantine for tyrannical desires. Friedrich Nietzsche

You can never have a revolution in order to establish democracy. You must have a democracy in order to have a revolution. G. K. Chesterton

In free countries, every man is entitled to express his opinions and every other man is entitled not to listen. G. Norman Collie

Only the person who does not evade conflict and directs his efforts in keeping with the course of society's development can be an effective leader. G. V. Plekhanov

Politics needs a flexible mind, for it has no immutable or eternal rules. In politics immutable or eternal rules lead to inevitable and swift defeat. G. V. Plekhanov

Faced with the choice between changing one's mind and proving that there is no need to do so, almost everyone gets busy on the proof. Galbraith's Law

My notion of democracy is that under it the weakest shall have the same opportunities as the strongest. Gandhi

Democracy substitutes election by the incompetent many for appointment by the corrupt few. George Bernard Shaw

Democracy is a device that ensures we shall be governed no better than we deserve. George Bernard Shaw

Democracy is a device that insures we shall be governed no better than we deserve. George Bernard Shaw

The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man. George Bernard Shaw

Democracy: The substitution of election by the incompetent many for appointment by the corrupt few. George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950)

Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote. George Jean Nathan

One sharp, stern struggle, and the slaves of centuries are free. George Massey

As Mankind becomes more liberal, they will be more apt to allow that all those who conduct themselves as worthy members of the community are equally entitled to the protections of civil government. George Washington

It is proof of a base and low mind for one to wish to think with the masses or majority, merely because the majority is the majority. Truth does not change because it is, or is not, believed by a majority of the people. Giordano Bruno

A pedestal is as much a prison as any small space. Gloria Steinem

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies. Groucho Marx

The job of a citizen is to keep his mouth open. Gunther Grass

A constitutional state is like daily bread, like water to drink and air to breath, and the best thing about democracy is that it is the only system capable of securing the constitutional state. Gustav Radbruch

The whole dream of democracy is to raise the proletarian to the level of stupidity attained by the bourgeois. Gustave Flaubert (1821-1880)

Under democracy one party always devotes its chief energies to trying to prove that the other party is unfit to rule - and both commonly succeed, and are right. H. L. Mencken (1880-1956)

The greatest task of democracy, its ritual and feast - is choice. H.G. Wells

Democracy is the theory that the common people know what they want and deserve to get it good and hard. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

Democracy is the art of running the circus from the monkey cage. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

Those who can -- do. Those who can't -- teach. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

Freedom of press is limited to those who own one. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

Imagine the Creator as a low comedian, and at once the world becomes explicable. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

Of government, at least in democratic states, it may be said briefly that it is an agency engaged wholesale, and as a matter of solemn duty, in the performance of acts which all self-respecting individuals refrain from as a matter of common decency. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

The cure for the evils of democracy is more democracy. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be lead to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

Government is a broker in pillage, and every election is a sort of advance auction in stolen goods. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

Democracy is a pathetic belief in the collective wisdom of individual ignorance. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

Say what you will about the Ten Commandments, you must always come back to the pleasant fact that there are only ten of them. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

Hanging one scoundrel, it appears, does not deter the next. Well, what of it? The first one is at least disposed of. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

Injustice is relatively easy to bear; what stings is justice. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

It is hard to believe that a man is telling the truth when you know that you would lie if you were in his place. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

The trouble with Communism is the Communists, just as the trouble with Christianity is the Christians. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

The cosmos is a gigantic flywheel making 10,000 revolutions per minute. Man is a sick fly taking a dizzy ride on it. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

Faith may be defined briefly as an illogical belief in the occurrence of the improbable. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

In this world of sin and sorrow there is always something to be thankful for. As for me, I rejoice that I am not a Republican. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

Liberals have many tails and chase them all. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

Remorse--Regret that one waited so long to do it. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

Democracy is also a form of worship. It is the worship of Jackals by Jackasses. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

We must respect the other fellow's religion, but only in the sense and to the extent that we respect his theory that his wife is beautiful and his children smart. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

Conscience is the inner voice that warns us somebody is looking. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

Truth would quickly cease to become stranger than fiction, once we got as used to it. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

The basic fact about human existence is not that it is a tragedy, but that it is a bore. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

Creator - A comedian whose audience is afraid to laugh. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

A newspaper is a device for making the ignorant more ignorant and the crazy crazier. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

It is the fundamental theory of all the more recent American law...that the average citizen is half-witted, and hence not to be trusted to either his own devices or his own thoughts. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

A celebrity is one who is known by many people he is glad he doesn't know. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

For every complex problem, there is a solution that is simple, neat, and wrong. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

Lawyer: One who protects us against robbery by taking away the temptation. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

Judge: A law student who marks his own papers. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

It is inaccurate to say I hate everything. I am strongly in favor of common sense, common honesty, and common decency. This makes me forever ineligible for public office. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

A good politician is quite as unthinkable as an honest burglar. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

A politician is an animal which can sit on a fence and yet keep both ears to the ground. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

The argument that capital punishment degrades the state is moonshine, for if that were true then it would degrade the state to send men to war... The state, in truth, is degraded in its very nature: a few butcheries cannot do it any further damage. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

The most common of all follies is to believe passionately in the palpably not true. It is the chief occupation of mankind. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

A professional politician is a professionally dishonorable man. In order to get anywhere near high office he has to make so many compromises and submit to so many humiliations that he becomes indistinguishable from a streetwalker. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

Giving every man a vote has no more made men wise and free than Christianity has made them good. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

Conscience is a mother-in-law whose visit never ends. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

Firmness in decision is often merely a form of stupidity. It indicates an inability to think the same thing out twice. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

Truth - Something somehow discreditable to someone. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

It is impossible to imagine the universe run by a wise, just and omnipotent God, but it is quite easy to imagine it run by a board of gods. If such a board actually exists it operates precisely like the board of a corporation that is losing money. H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)

Democracy is based upon the conviction that there are extraordinary possibilities in ordinary people. Harry Emerson Fosdick

Democracy cannot be forced upon a society, neither is it a gift that can be held forever. It has to be struggled hard for and defended everyday anew. Heinz Galinski

Our democracy is but a name. We vote? What does that mean? It means that we choose between two bodies of real, though not avowed, autocrats. We choose between Tweedledum and Tweedledee. Helen Keller

The majority is never right. Never, I tell you! That's one of these lies in society that no free and intelligent man can help rebelling against. Who are the people that make up the biggest proportion of the population -- the intelligent ones or the fools? Henrik Ibsen

That government is best which governs least. Henry David Thoreau

If...the machine of government...is of such a nature that it requires you to be the agent of injustice to another, then, I say, break the law. Henry David Thoreau

A society of sheep must in time beget a government of wolves. Henry de Jouvenel

It is a paradox that every dictator has climbed to power on the ladder of free speech. Immediately on attaining power each dictator has suppressed all free speech except his own. Herbert Clark Hoover

Calm and order can be just as dangerous to democracy as uneasiness and disorder. Hildegard Hamm-Bruecher

The right to be heard does not automatically include the right to be taken seriously. Hubert H. Humphrey

Complete equality isn't compatible with democracy, but it is a agreeable to totalitarianism. After all the only way to ensure the equality of the slothful, the inept and the immoral is to suppress everyone else. Iain Benson

Liberty is the possibility of doubting, the possibility of making a mistake, the possibility of searching and experimenting, the possibility of saying No to any authority - literary, artistic, philosophic, religious, social, and even political. Ignazio Silone

Democracy does not guarantee equality of conditions - it only guarantees equality of opportunity. Irving Kristol

Democracy does not guarantee equality of conditions -- it only guarantees equality of opportunity. Irving Kristol

So many, though reluctant to admit it. Shun clever men, and rather suffer fools. Ivan Krylov

In a democracy dissent is an act of faith. Like medicine, the test of its value is not in its taste, but in its effects. J. W. Fulbright

In a democracy, dissent is an act of faith. J. William Fulbright

Democracy without morality is impossible. Jack Kemp

In a democracy the people get what the majority deserves. James Davidson

Thinking of mass democracy as government controlled by its employees helps explain the difficulty of changing government policy. James Davidson

The tendency of democracies is, in all things, to mediocrity, since the tastes, knowledge, and principles of the majority form the tribunal of appeal. James Fenimore Cooper

It is the besetting vice of democracies to substitute public opinion for law. This is the usual form in which the masses of men exhibit their tyranny. James Fenimore Cooper

The disposition of all power is to abuses, nor does it at all mend the matter that its possessors are a majority. James Fenimore Cooper

Democracies have been found incompatible with personal security or the rights of property; and in general been as short in their lives as they have been violent in their death. James Madison

The ultimate authority ... resides in the people alone. James Madison

The advancement and diffusion of knowledge is the only guardian of true liberty. James Madison

If we advert to the nature of republican government, we shall find that the censorial power is in the people over the government, and not in the government over the people. James Madison

Democracy gives every man the right to be his own oppressor. James Russell Lowell

Democracy is the form of government that gives every man the right to be his own oppressor. James Russell Lowell

Those accept an obligation lightly who feel lightly about letting it drop. Janis Rainis

Democracy is good. I say this because other systems are worse. Jawaharlal Nehru

Democracy means having the choice. Dictatorship means being given the choice. Jeannine Luczak

The price of the democratic way of life is a growing appreciation of people's differences, not merely as tolerable, but as the essence of a rich and rewarding human experience. Jerome Nathanson

In politics, an organized minority is a political majority. Jesse Jackson

The voice of the majority is no proof of justice. Johann von Schiller

Democracy does not race, it reaches the finish slowly but surely. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Remember, democracy never lasts long. It soon wastes, exhausts, and murders itself. There never was a democracy yet that did not commit suicide. John Adams

A free government is a complicated piece of machinery, the nice and exact adjustment of whose springs, wheels, and weights, is not yet well comprehended by the artists of the age, and still less by the people. John Adams to Thomas Jefferson

Any doctrine that weakens personal responsibility for judgment and for action helps create the attitudes that welcome and support the totalitarian state. John Dewey

Democracy evolves where freedom is able to determine its own policy. John Dos Passos

Nor is the people's judgment always true: the most may err as grossly as the few. John Dryden

Those who make peaceful change impossible will make violent revolution inevitable. John F. Kennedy

Those who make peaceful revolution impossible will make violent revolution inevitable. John F. Kennedy

Life in freedom is not easy, and democracy is not perfect. John F. Kennedy

Politics is the art of choosing between the disastrous and the unpalatable. John Galbraith

Nothing is so admirable in politics as a short memory. John Kenneth Galbraith

The ideas of economists and political philosophers, both when they are right and when they are wrong, are more powerful than is generally understood. Indeed, the world is ruled by little else. John Maynard Keynes

Anarchy is the sure consequence of tyranny; for no power that is not limited by laws can ever be protected by them. John Milton

Democracy ... is a system of self-determination. It's the right to make the wrong choice. John Patrick

Democracy encourages the majority to decide things about which the majority is blissfully ignorant. John Simon

Democracy encourages the majority to decide things about which the majority is ignorant. John Simon

If mankind minus one were of one opinion, then mankind is no more justified in silencing the one than the one - if he had the power - would be justified in silencing mankind. John Stuart Mill

Those who suppress freedom always do so in the name of law and order. John V. Lindsay

The well being of democracies regardless of their type and status is dependent on one small technical detail: The right to vote. Everything else is secondary. Jose Ortega y Gasset

Every nation has the government it deserves. Joseph de Maistre

As scarce as truth is, the supply has always been in excess of the demand. Josh Billings

No man's life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session. Judge Gideon J. Tucker

I personally call the type of government which can be removed without violence 'democracy,' and the other, 'tyranny.'. Karl Popper

It is wrong to ask who will rule. The ability to vote a bad government out of office is enough. That is democracy. Karl Popper

We'd all like to vote for the best man but he's never a candidate. Kin Hubbard

People despise the lust for power that originates from a craving for homage and for the attributes of power. Konstantin Ushinsky

Democracy is a process by which the people are free to choose the man who will get the blame. Laurence Peter

Democracy is a process by which the people are free to choose the man who will get the blame. Laurence Peter

Human beings are perhaps never more frightening than when they are convinced beyond doubt that they are right. Laurens van der Post

Man has received direct from God only one instrument wherewith to know himself and to know his relation to the universe--he has no other--and that instrument is reason. Leo Tolstoi (Count Lev Tolstoy)

Historians are like deaf people who go on answering questions that no one has asked them. Leo Tolstoi

History would be an excellent thing, if only it were true. Leo Tolstoi

He never chooses an opinion, he just wears whatever happens to be in style. Leo Tolstoi

Not our location is important, but the direction in which we move. Leo Tolstoi

Every person knows that he should do what unites, not divides, him and other people.Leo Tolstoi

Governments need armies to protect them from their enslaved and oppressed subjects.Leo Tolstoi

The laws of economics tell us that the expansion of the central state can't go on forever. Its limit is reached when the looted turn on the looters. Llewellyn H. Rockwell, Jr

It is bad to be oppressed by a minority, but it is worse to be oppressed by a majority. Lord Acton

The essence of democracy is not that everyone makes and administers laws but that lawgivers and rulers should be dependent on the people's will in such a way that they may be peaceably changed if conflict occurs. Ludwig von Mises

In the long run the ideas of the majority, however detrimental they may be, will carry on. The future of mankind depends on the ability of the elite to influence public opinion in the right direction. Ludwig von Mises

Despots and democratic majorities are drunk with power. Ludwig von Mises

Those believing they have not voted are mistaken, for their indifference affects all our futures. M.A. Denck

There is nothing more difficult to take in hand, more perilous to conduct, or more uncertain in its success, than to take the lead in the introduction of a new order of things. Machiavelli

In matters of conscience, the law of majority has no place. Mahatma Gandhi

There is no reason to believe that there is one law for families and another for nations. Mahatma Gandhi

An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind. Mahatma Gandhi

Retaliation is counter-poison and poison breeds more poison. The nectar of Love alone can destroy the poison of hate. Mahatma Gandhi

I see neither bravery nor sacrifice in destroying life or property, for offense or defense. Mahatma Gandhi

To answer brutality with brutality is to admit one's moral and intellectual bankruptcy. Mahatma Gandhi

Whenever you have truth it must be given with love, or the message and the messenger will be rejected. Mahatma Gandhi

Civil disobedience becomes a sacred duty when the state becomes lawless or corrupt. Mahatma Gandhi

Democracy and violence can ill go together. Mahatma Gandhi

Evolution of democracy is not possible if we are not prepared to hear the other side. Mahatma Gandhi

In true democracy every man and woman is taught to think for himself or herself. Mahatma Gandhi

Democracy is not a state in which people act like sheep. Mahatma Gandhi

The spirit of democracy cannot be established in the midst of terrorism, whether governmental or popular. Mahatma Gandhi

Nonviolence is not a weapon of the weak. It is a weapon of the strongest and bravest. Mahatma Gandhi

The force generated by nonviolence is infinitely greater than the force of all the arms created by man's ingenuity. Mahatma Gandhi

A "No" uttered from deepest conviction is better and greater than a "Yes" merely uttered to please, or what is worse, to avoid trouble. Mahatma Gandhi

The only tyrant I accept in this world is the still voice within. Mahatma Gandhi

What you do is of little significance, but it is very important that you do it. Mahatma Gandhi

We must become the change we want to see in the world. Mahatma Gandhi

The only devils in the world are those running around in our own hearts - that is where the battle should be fought. Mahatma Gandhi

Performance of one's duties should be independent of public opinion. Mahatma Gandhi

The spirit of democracy cannot be superimposed from the outside. It must come from within. Mahatma Gandhi

I understand democracy as something that gives the weak the same chance as the strong. Mahatma Gandhi

Democracy means: Sticking to the rules of the game, even when the referee is not looking. Manfred Hausmann

It is as hard for the good to suspect evil, as it is for the bad to suspect good. Marcus Tullius Cicero

Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. Margaret Mead

We adore titles and heredities in our hearts and ridicule them with our mouths. This is our democratic privilege. Mark Twain

Democracy is the name we give the people whenever we need them. Marquis de Flers Robert and Arman de Caillavet

In actual fact those who do not care for politics and sit on the fence do indeed side for a political party: The ruling party. Max Frisch

The dignity of man is in free choice. Max Frisch

Any law which violates the indefeasible rights of man is essentially unjust and tyrannical; it is not a law at all. Maximilien Robespierre

Everybody's for democracy in principle. It's only in practice that the thing gives rise to stiff objections. Meg Greenfield

To feed men and not to love them is to treat them as if they were barnyard cattle. To love them and not respect them is to treat them as if they were household pets. Mencius, philosopher

The Constitution, in a very significant sense, is not a mechanism for making decisions but preventing them. Michael Gilson De Lomos

is so firmly believed as that which we least know. Michel de Montaigne

Every society honors its live conformists and its dead troublemakers. Mignon McLaughlin

The human race has entered a stage where we are all dependent on each other. No other country or nation should be regarded in total separation from another, let alone pitted against another. Mikhail Gorbachev

If you are called upon to govern humans, treat them humanely. Mikhail Kalinin

In democracy its your vote that counts. In feudalism its your count that votes. Mogens Jallberg

In democracy its your vote that counts.; In feudalism its your count that votes. Mogens Jallberg

It is not only for what we do that we are held responsible, but also for what we do not do. Moliere

Whatever field of human activity one may take, only those trends that are in harmony with the needs of society show rapid progress. Nikolai Chernyshevsky

If an individual agrees with everybody, he lacks conviction; if he likes everybody and is everybody's friend, he is indifferent to one and all. Nikolai Dobrolyubov

In a democracy, the individual enjoys not only the ultimate power but carries the ultimate responsibility. Norman Cousins

A modern democracy is a tyranny whose borders are undefined; one discovers how far one can go only by traveling in a straight line until one is stopped. Norman Mailer

Who's more foolish: the fool, or the fool who follows him? Obi Wan Kenobi

I have no respect for the passion for equality, which seems to me merely idealizing envy. Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr

Democracy means simply the bludgeoning of the people by the people for the people. Oscar Wilde

Democracy is the bludgeoning of the people, by the people, for the people. Oscar Wilde (1854-1900)

Laws are like sausages. You sleep far better the less you know about how they are made. Otto Von Bismark

Traditions are never left in peace: they degenerate if they are not perfected. P. A. Pavlenko

Politicians are always interested in people. Not that this is always a virtue. Fleas are interested in dogs. P.J. O’Rourke

Washing one's hands of the conflict between the powerful and the powerless means to side with the powerful, not to be neutral. Paulo Freire

The common people suffer when the powerful disagree. Phaedrus

An imbalance between rich and poor is the oldest and most fatal ailment of all republics. Plato

Democracy is a charming form of government, full of variety and disorder, and dispensing a sort of equality to equals and unequal alike. Plato

When the tyrant has disposed of foreign enemies by conquest or treaty, and there is nothing to fear from them, then he is always stirring up some war or other, in order that the people may require a leader. Plato

Justice will only exist where those not effected by injustice are filled with the same amount of indignation as those offended. Plato

The history of any nation is not only a succession of events, but also a chain of ideas. Pyotr Chaadayev

There can be no daily democracy without daily citizenship. Ralph Nader

Democracy becomes a government of bullies tempered by editors. Ralph Waldo Emerson

If you put a chain around the neck of a slave, the other end fastens itself around your own. Ralph Waldo Emerson

Man's capacity for justice makes democracy possible, but man's inclination to injustice makes democracy necessary. Reinhold Niebuhr

Democracy feeds on argument, on the discussion as to the right way forward. This is the reason why respecting the opinion of others belongs to democracy. Richard von Weizsacker

The greatest fallacy of democracy is that everyone's opinion is worth the same. Robert Anson Heinlein

We once worried that democracy could not survive if an undereducated populace knew too little. Now we worry if it can survive us knowing too much. Robert Bianco

Democracy is being allowed to vote for the candidate you dislike least. Robert Byrne

Each time a man stands up for an ideal, or acts to improve the lot of others, or strikes out against injustice, he sends forth a tiny ripple of hope...build(ing) a current that can sweep down the mightiest walls of oppression and resistance. Robert F. Kennedy

The death of democracy is not likely to be an assassination from ambush. It will be a slow extinction from apathy, indifference, and undernourishment. Robert Hutchins

So long as we have enough people in this country willing to fight for their rights, we'll be called a democracy. Roger Baldwin, founder ACLU

Freedom is about authority. Freedom is about the willingness of every single human being to cede to lawful authority a great deal of discretion about what you do. Rudolf Giuliani

The way to virtually eliminate genocide and mass murder appears to be through restricting and checking power. This means to foster democratic freedom. Rudolph Rummel

Violence is the last resource of the incompetence. Salvor Hardin

He that accepts protection, stipulates obedience. Samuel Johnson

A great deal of intelligence can be invested in ignorance when the need for illusion is deep. Saul Bellow

Democracy is a form of government in which it is permitted to wonder aloud what the country could do under first-class management. Senator Soaper

Good government could never be a substitute for government by the people themselves. Sir Henry Campbell-Bannerman, British Prime Minister

Democracy, as has been said of Christianity, has never really been tried. Stuart Chase

The more corrupt the state, the numerous the laws. Tacitus

The flood of money that gushes into politics today is a pollution of democracy. Theodore H. White

Democracy means not "I am as good as you are" but "You are as good as I am.". Theodore Parker

Democracy is not "I am as good as you", but "You are as good as I am". Theodore Parker

Restlessness and discontent are the first necessities of progress. Thomas A. Edison

I have long been convinced that institutions purely democratic must, sooner or later, destroy liberty or civilization, or both. Thomas Babington Macaulay

If a little knowledge is dangerous, where is the man who has so much as to be out of danger? Thomas Henry Huxley

Unnecessary laws are not good laws, but traps for money. Thomas Hobbes

Whenever the people are well-informed, they can be trusted with their own government. Thomas Jefferson

In a government bottomed on the will of all, the... liberty of every individual citizen becomes interesting to all. Thomas Jefferson

The majority, oppressing an individual, is guilty of a crime, abuses its strength, and by acting on the law of the strongest breaks up the foundations of society. Thomas Jefferson

The democracy will cease to exist when you take away from those who are willing to work and give to those who would not. Thomas Jefferson

Laws provide against injury from others; but not from ourselves. Thomas Jefferson

I know of no safe repository of the ultimate power of society but the people. And if we think them not enlightened enough, the remedy is not to take power from them, but to inform them by education. Thomas Jefferson

It is the old practice of despots to use a part of the people to keep the rest in order. Thomas Jefferson

It's not the voting that's democracy; it's the counting. Tom Stoppard

Creative ability and personal responsibility are strongest when the mind is free from supernatural belief and operates in an atmosphere of freedom and democracy. Unknown

The most serious threat to democracy is the notion that it has already been achieved. Unknown

A great war always creates more scoundrels than it kills. Unknown

Democracy is a government where you can say what you think even if you don't think. Unknown

When the government fears the people, that is LIBERTY. When people fear the government, that is TYRANNY. Unknown

When a nation's government becomes more fearful of its citizens' rights than protective of them, that nation's future is only despotism and extinction. Unknown

He who fox-like got his rank, Is wolf-like in his office. V. A. Zhukovsky

Politics is the most concentrated expression of economics. V. I. Lenin

All extremes are bad. All that is good and useful, if carried to extremes, may become-and beyond a certain limit is bound to become-bad and injurious. V. I. Lenin

Face the truth squarely. In politics that is always the best and the only correct attitude. V. I. Lenin

False rhetoric and false boastfulness spell moral ruin and lead unfailingly to political extinction. V. I. Lenin

Honesty in politics is the result of strength; hypocrisy is the result of weakness. V. I. Lenin

Our idea is that a state is strong when the people are politically conscious. It is strong when the people know everything, can form an opinion of everything, and do everything consciously. V. I. Lenin

Don't be afraid to admit defeat. Learn from defeat. Do over again more thoroughly, more carefully, and more systematically what you have done badly. V. I. Lenin

People always have been and they always will be stupid victims of deceit and self-deception in politics. V. I. Lenin

Life teaches none but those who study it. V. O. Kliuchevsky

The right to be respected is won by respecting others. Vassily Sukhomlinsky

I am strongly convinced that the people or society is the best and the most unerring critic. Vissarion Belinsky

Democracy is when you are not closed for being open. Vlada Bulatovitch

People aren't angels woven of light, but neither are they beasts to be driven into stalls. Vladimir Korolenko

...a legal electoral system alone will not guarantee full-fledged democracy unless it is incorporated into the real democratic institutions of society as a whole. Vladimir Putin

The pleasure of governing must certainly be exquisite, if we may judge from the vast numbers who are eager to be concerned with it. Voltaire

A great many laws in a country, like many physicians, is a sign of malady. Voltaire

A democratic despotism is like a theocracy: it assumes its own correctness. Walter Bagehot

We must abandon the notion that the people govern. Instead, we must adopt the theory that, by their occasional mobilizations as a majority, people support or oppose the individuals who actually govern. Walter Lippman

This is one of the paradoxes of the democratic movement -- that it loves a crowd and fears the individuals who compose it -- that the religion of humanity should have no faith in human beings. Walter Lippmann

Too many people expect wonders from democracy, when the most wonderful thing of all is just having it. Walter Winchell

Political elections do not choose leaders of society. Rather, they are an exercise in which groups of people choose individuals who will assist them in looting other groups of individuals. William Anderson

The best defense against usurpatory government is an assertive citizenry. William F. Buckley

Truth often suffers more by the heat of its defenders than the arguments of its opposers. William Penn

Necessity is the plea for every infringement of human freedom: it is the argument of tyrants; it is the creed of slaves. William Pitt

A politician will do anything to keep his job - even become a patriot. William Randolph Hearst

The best argument against democracy is a five minute conversation with the average voter. Winston Churchill

Many forms of Government have been tried, and will be tried in this world of sin and woe. No one pretends that democracy is perfect or all-wise. Indeed, it has been said that democracy is the worst form of Government except all those others that have been Winston Churchill